House Shark movie poster, a horror comedy

House Shark 2019 is a weird movie. I’m an enthusiast of independent cinema, drawn to the kind of low-budget, high-creativity films that are bursting with passion and raw talent. Those fortunate enough to reach a prominent film festival before their release often turn into coveted treasures. Those who don’t manage such feats must vie for attention amongst a sea of eager filmmakers, all hoping for their moment in the spotlight.

I follow several movie reviewers—who could ignore the insights from Voices From the Balcony, MovieHooker.com, or Roger Ebert from days of old? Jim Morazzini of Voices from the Balcony piqued my interest in “House Shark,” a film penned and directed by Ron Bonk. His creation is a testament to the ambitious spirit of microbudget filmmaking. Having watched the movie, I find myself in a true critic’s predicament: challenged to articulate a positive critique, yet with the understanding that there is a unique charm in every passionate endeavor, no matter how niche or eccentric.

What is House Shark About?

Frank lives with his son Michael and for some reason, a shark is living inside his house. As Frank looks further into what it might be that’s terrorizing his suburban digs, he discovers he can enlist the assistance of a ‘House Shark” Expert to help him with his woes.

Quick Film Information for House Shark

  • Release: October 2017 at Nightmares Film Festival,
  • Writer and director Ron Bonk,
  • Starring: Trey Harrison, Michael Merchant, Wes Reid, and Wayne W. Johnson,
  • House Shark is available to stream on the most popular platforms.

Production — Potato Eater Productions and SRS Cinema.

Distribution — IndieGoGo

House Shark Bad Horror Movie Review

Certainly, there’s a niche audience that relishes the unique charm of low-budget shark movies. These films, notorious for their whimsical take on the shark genre, have earned a cult following. Titles such as “3-Headed Shark Attack” (2015), “Super Shark” (2011), and “Sand Sharks” (2012) are prime examples. Amid the field, some feature genuinely entertaining sequences, others boast misleadingly promising trailers and a few dazzle with commendable CGI effects. However, “House Shark” fails to align with its predecessors’ accidental allure.

Heading into the review of “House Shark,” I was optimistic about highlighting its merits. Regrettably, the film’s sole redeeming aspect was its tongue-in-cheek nods to its more illustrious shark-themed cinema cousins. A solitary snicker was all it could muster from me during its nearly two-hour endurance test. Such an extended duration is unfathomable, given the paper-thin plot that seems weaker than Jello. The acting, effects, and set designs scream of a do-it-yourself shark flick cobbled together with everyday household items.

The monumental success of films like “Sharknado” has inspired a surge in parody-centric shark films. Yet, in this burgeoning sub-genre of shark spoofs, “House Shark” unfortunately misses the mark.

Are There Any Redeeming Qualities?

Look, I get it, it’s a massive effort to make a movie. I respect that this is one of those times. I love that filmmakers want to do this stuff with nothing but their own volition. But for the love of all things sane, give it a runtime that doesn’t make me require toothpicks to keep my eyes open from the boredom in between watching and waiting for the shark to appear.

Potentially, this could have been something I could talk about with lovers of cheese and all things toilet humor (which I hate, but hey that’s me.) In this case, I would actually rather watch Cynthia (2018) and that was something I was considering as the worst of the bad movies I’ve seen this year. Now I have this.

I give House Shark 

1 What the hell was on Franks’ face? out of 5

Watch House Shark in the USA for free on all the free platforms like TubiTV, Plex, Freevee, Roku, and Vudu.

Love Bad Horror Movies? Break Out Some Cheese & Eat It In A Shark House

House Shark 2017
Image courtesy of Potato Eater Productions
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